Its 2019, updated April of 2019 💕
Hi.
Banyak benda yang tak ter update since aku masuk sini.
Nak update untuk setiap cerita, tapi terlalu busy. Hari ni 1 April.
Okay, fisrt thing first, medic is not as easy as ABC. Im one of those yang active sports dulu especially netball (its my fav) but i could not do much multitasking. So i decided untuk forget semua nya & focus on my studies. Sebb i have my own schedule, that i literally not brave enough untuk selitkan macam macam activity. So i totally respect those yang participate any kinds of competition, or yes baru baru ni ahli UNIMED baru je nak build up, and kawan kawan aku semua ada yang masuk and i support them as what friends should do.
Family angkat is supposedly what medical students should have. Sebb kitorang akan do some investigations and medical purposes on them, selain itu kitorang pun dah benefit which hidup cara orang kat sini.
about studies here, 8am-5pm classes all the time.
Assignments, quiz, end of block examination, - ok normal. which is initially, kind of frustrating enough but yeah, i shld adapt with it.
Hidup aku?
4 years already, i think i should take the biggest step, i have to move on. I should try again anag again even after each failure.
Hidup ini ada turun naik, aku pernah naik, aku pernah turun, aku pernah jatuh aku pernah juga happy kat puncak. Tapi aku lupa, yang sebenarnya Allah pegang semua tu.
I decided untuk just focus dengan apa yang lebih penting, aku tak pandai nak gunakan orang untuk happy kan diri aku, so it's all about myself.
I should really move on, which is a big mistake for me kalau one day i still have that feelings toward somebody's husband. Dosa besar, izzati.
I should clear things because it is the time. For me, to climb up after falling, its not an easy task, but aku percaya kalau kena pada masa dan waktu yg tepat, Allah akan tetap selalu ada dengan aku because you have to trust on God's plan.
4 years is a big gap. The suffers, the tears, i think i had spent time on unbeneficial things.
Aku takda platform lain untuk aku express and confess feelings aku, so macam selalu aku buat since my teenagers life - writing. remember that i got this one thick green book yang aku simpan kat rumah which aku tulis semua benda kat dalam tu. Too much memories, aku patut buang tapi tak semua memori tu bitter kan, ada je among of them yg buat kita happy.
One thing,
4 tahun ke 5 tahun ke 6 tahun ke, i still take time.
Not because im missing but its because i'm healing.
I read a tweet by somebdy
It's not good smh untuk grieve for something yang belum pasti untuk masa yang terlalu lama.
Maybe i love too much that i hope for something that beyond my control, so ends up it hurts so much.
I'm not a socialized person that i could get easily attached to anybody, so it's a little bit late for me to have my good time. But not literally means that i am that kind of snobbish (?) , nope. jst don't judge a book by its cover . (wow i use a proverb)
aku busy sangat kat sini. entah apa tah yang busy.
mungkin the aim is to forget apa yang tak patut fikir.
that im worried if i ever showing any depression symptoms. no, im not a depressed person.
entah, am i?
whatever,
yang aku tahu, i wanna get rid of everything apa yang aku rasa untuk bertahun lama selama ni, bagi rasa kosong, and i want to restart my life (which is basically start a new life, with new lessons)
apa yang penting, i want to pass my medical school with flying colours that make my parents so proud of me and buat diorang rasa tak menyesal keluarkan duit banyak untuk anak diorang yang banyak songeh juga ni (who is hiding so much secrets, sorry)
Last but not least,
everyone has their own story - whether its good or bad , jst they dont tell you about it because they choose to, don't blame them anything, they just want a hug where they could cry until sleep.
They choose to keep it to themselves, not to grieve but to handle it wisely.
I think i should do tat too. Aku yakin, aku berhak untuk dapat lebih daripada apa yang dah jadi, lebih daripada semua ini, just its not the time yet.
Believe in Allah. Minta Dia buang segala rasa yang ada, & let me be heartless.
Btw, im praying for my medical friends here that they dont end up like me, keep on striving, dont give up (common words, ok letme give another uncommon words)
You are always the best among others and you had done whats good for you. A good friend enough 👍.
Kawan-kawan yang tahu sejak awal, doakan selalu jangan pernah putus. Im not relying on you to always be there for me but i believe you're a good friend that you're not leaving me alone.
till we meet again,
tyy
dolphin x
 |
| source: tq pininterest |
Banyak benda yang tak ter update since aku masuk sini.
Nak update untuk setiap cerita, tapi terlalu busy. Hari ni 1 April.
Okay, fisrt thing first, medic is not as easy as ABC. Im one of those yang active sports dulu especially netball (its my fav) but i could not do much multitasking. So i decided untuk forget semua nya & focus on my studies. Sebb i have my own schedule, that i literally not brave enough untuk selitkan macam macam activity. So i totally respect those yang participate any kinds of competition, or yes baru baru ni ahli UNIMED baru je nak build up, and kawan kawan aku semua ada yang masuk and i support them as what friends should do.
 | |||||||||
| Nothing much, family angkat kat sini. |
about studies here, 8am-5pm classes all the time.
Assignments, quiz, end of block examination, - ok normal. which is initially, kind of frustrating enough but yeah, i shld adapt with it.
Hidup aku?
4 years already, i think i should take the biggest step, i have to move on. I should try again anag again even after each failure.
Hidup ini ada turun naik, aku pernah naik, aku pernah turun, aku pernah jatuh aku pernah juga happy kat puncak. Tapi aku lupa, yang sebenarnya Allah pegang semua tu.
I decided untuk just focus dengan apa yang lebih penting, aku tak pandai nak gunakan orang untuk happy kan diri aku, so it's all about myself.
I should really move on, which is a big mistake for me kalau one day i still have that feelings toward somebody's husband. Dosa besar, izzati.
I should clear things because it is the time. For me, to climb up after falling, its not an easy task, but aku percaya kalau kena pada masa dan waktu yg tepat, Allah akan tetap selalu ada dengan aku because you have to trust on God's plan.
4 years is a big gap. The suffers, the tears, i think i had spent time on unbeneficial things.
Aku takda platform lain untuk aku express and confess feelings aku, so macam selalu aku buat since my teenagers life - writing. remember that i got this one thick green book yang aku simpan kat rumah which aku tulis semua benda kat dalam tu. Too much memories, aku patut buang tapi tak semua memori tu bitter kan, ada je among of them yg buat kita happy.
 |
| Family Health visit 1 @ Kg Mang Tradisi |
4 tahun ke 5 tahun ke 6 tahun ke, i still take time.
Not because im missing but its because i'm healing.
I read a tweet by somebdy
Kadang kita jauhkan diri dari seseorang tu bukan sengaja atau bukan kehendak kita, but it is better that way
It's not good smh untuk grieve for something yang belum pasti untuk masa yang terlalu lama.
Maybe i love too much that i hope for something that beyond my control, so ends up it hurts so much.
I'm not a socialized person that i could get easily attached to anybody, so it's a little bit late for me to have my good time. But not literally means that i am that kind of snobbish (?) , nope. jst don't judge a book by its cover . (wow i use a proverb)
aku busy sangat kat sini. entah apa tah yang busy.
mungkin the aim is to forget apa yang tak patut fikir.
that im worried if i ever showing any depression symptoms. no, im not a depressed person.
entah, am i?
whatever,
yang aku tahu, i wanna get rid of everything apa yang aku rasa untuk bertahun lama selama ni, bagi rasa kosong, and i want to restart my life (which is basically start a new life, with new lessons)
apa yang penting, i want to pass my medical school with flying colours that make my parents so proud of me and buat diorang rasa tak menyesal keluarkan duit banyak untuk anak diorang yang banyak songeh juga ni (who is hiding so much secrets, sorry)
 | |
| ni masa aku drew blood all by myself drpd tangan Amirah - we call it as venous blood taking (phlebotomy) |
everyone has their own story - whether its good or bad , jst they dont tell you about it because they choose to, don't blame them anything, they just want a hug where they could cry until sleep.
They choose to keep it to themselves, not to grieve but to handle it wisely.
I think i should do tat too. Aku yakin, aku berhak untuk dapat lebih daripada apa yang dah jadi, lebih daripada semua ini, just its not the time yet.
Believe in Allah. Minta Dia buang segala rasa yang ada, & let me be heartless.
Btw, im praying for my medical friends here that they dont end up like me, keep on striving, dont give up (common words, ok letme give another uncommon words)
You are always the best among others and you had done whats good for you. A good friend enough 👍.
Kawan-kawan yang tahu sejak awal, doakan selalu jangan pernah putus. Im not relying on you to always be there for me but i believe you're a good friend that you're not leaving me alone.
till we meet again,
tyy
dolphin x
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